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[aggressiveapathy]

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[infomodder]

of course
anything else you want me to pick up while i'm out here with the other idiots who didn't get a turkey a week ago?

[aggressiveapathy]

paper turkeys
we have lost childhoods to make up

[infomodder]

are we going to make them with our hands too? little group project after the meal?
shit
just imagine how big Jeff's hand turkey is going to be
that thing will be monstrous

[aggressiveapathy]

jeff doesn't need to show off his big bird to the kids

[infomodder]

we can't exclude him
he's part of the family too

[aggressiveapathy]

he's from non-murder land
he's as sick of thanksgiving as the rest of us

[infomodder]

you can be sick of murder AND thanksgiving

[Can April imagine her husband has enough exasperation to spare for holiday seasons and serial killers? Wait til he refuses to leave the bed on Black Friday.]

besides
what are holidays for
if not to torture your loved ones?

[aggressiveapathy]

you're right
he's leading them in a chorus of turkeys united

[infomodder]

if he doesn't wanna be homeless for the holidays
he knows what needs doing

[aggressiveapathy]

i wanna marry you again right now

[infomodder]

our six month anniversary was less than two weeks ago
we could have a vow renewal
people might give us things
for free

[aggressiveapathy]

forget people
you owe me another trip to exotic lands
we can send shocking postcards from

[infomodder]

ireland?
spain?

[aggressiveapathy]

transylvania?

[infomodder]

oh
is it time to introduce me to the other vampire royalty?

[aggressiveapathy]

like i need their approval
time to take what is rightfully ours

[infomodder]

are we going to start a war with them?

[aggressiveapathy]

that's their call

[infomodder]

perfect spot to ring in the new year
i'll get on travel plans next week