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[aggressiveapathy]

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[infomodder]

[There is a long ass pause before:]

is whoever you married here?

[aggressiveapathy]

you wanna know the whole story?

[infomodder]

if you're willing to share it?
yes

[aggressiveapathy]

god
i want to break up with you
so i can seduce you again
it'd all be network history if the gods didn't eat it between universes
but that'll be the v-day travel story
so
pretend you didn't hear about my vegas wedding for like two weeks

[infomodder]

[Rude.]

i didn't hear about any vegas weddings
if that's the only reason you have to break up with me
i think we're doing okay
but
how am i supposed to react if you do that?
break up with me
hypothetically speaking

[is that when the stalking starts

mr. graham will see you now

(no, never)]

[aggressiveapathy]

love me enough to seduce me again
like i said
if that wasn't obvious i don't know if you deserve wedding story

[infomodder]

i can do that

[An entire shiver of sharks named April, as well as a few endangered whales. And a walrus. Maybe? Something decidedly not murder.]

i don't know about any wedding stories
what wedding story?

[Look, he follows rules so well! Love him.]

[aggressiveapathy]

future you will get the joke
in cold war vegas

[infomodder]

future will will get the joke?

[finds a dad outside the shop

shares this stupid joke

laughs for an hour

high fives]

[aggressiveapathy]

no sex tonight

[ she will probably forget about this pun sin before tonight.

but still. god. ]

[infomodder]

i'll practice the seduction technique
in that case

[Something is going to die.

Or.

Hamster 3.]

[aggressiveapathy]

you're on

[ all the animals. humane society ain't got nothing on them ]

[infomodder]

yeah?
shop's closing in an hour
[WELP
who cares about adult responsibilities right now whoever it may be can just
hold their objections]
i'll be home soon

[aggressiveapathy]

ill be there
hanging up my work clothes
in our closet

[ so...snap? ]

[infomodder]

[holy shit

he can find something for those surprises another day

it's all hamsters and home from here, THE IMAGINATION HAS BEEN SPARKED]

oh my god
i'm so grateful we rarely have any customers right now

[embarrassingly sparked, so soon]

[aggressiveapathy]

just because it's our closet
you cannot have my work clothes
to be clear
unless you ask nice

[infomodder]

[can he just turn the lights off and flip the sign with his mind

someone please help will graham stop thinking of clothes in a closet and thus not on—

help]

i don't want your work clothes
our closet can keep all of our clothes as far as i'm concerned
unless there's company

[aggressiveapathy]

well
abby may need to learn to knock

[infomodder]

we could make a specific day for it
no reason to hate monday then

[did he say the shop was closing in an hour

because the sign says it's closed right now, look at that

the power of april ludgate]

[aggressiveapathy]

[ Her powers are going to end in them having no money. And having to turn to a life of crime. Flawless plan, really. ]

nah
she's tough
and knows where babies come from

[infomodder]

[A+ totally endorsed.]

yeah
you should tell her that the first one sometime
not the second
fyi

[aggressiveapathy]

that's spoiling the child william

[infomodder]

sparing the rod is spoiling the child
that's just giving her a deserved compliment
aprilicia

[aggressiveapathy]

i'm changing my name to that
and you can be willimus

[infomodder]

that's not fair
yours sounds like a pop star
or one of those poets who only writes in lowercase
mine sounds like some crap gladiator